Before dawn this morning, my Bipeds magic parrot rang. The Biped put on it's cowboy clothes. YAY I love running along with the horsies. Rush, rush, seemed to be in so much a hurry the biped was banging into things in the kitchen. This is generally a good thing because that means breakfast. No breakfast but it won't be long. Next thing I'm wearing my orange blazer, but it's still too dark out to see what colour it is. Out for the morning constiTOOTional and I'm back leaning against the door, still outside. I see the biped put on layers of polar fleece and a big down parka with a hood. Huge wet snow is landing all over. Like slush falling right out of the sky. Ice pellets, rain, slush. I heard him grabbing the big rubble bag out of the closet. I never get to go when the rubble bag is out but I'm dressed in the vest so I have to go. The biped runs out the door, paws full, the swinging door nearly knock me off my feet. I don't know how many times it has asked me not to sit there for just that reason but that's where I sit. We RUN up to the car, then I notice it is bringing Mercy along too. Jump in while it loads up the trunk. "Can I see your registration, insurance and license please?" It always says that when I'm in it's seat. I wish it would come up with a new one. I move into my spot. I sense urgency. Biped reaches into the rubble bag, it's my breakfast. I never get to eat in the car. This is fantastic, eating and car ride at the same time. Biped driving like we're being chased by a cougar. All the big low lights on and the snow coming down so hard it's like we're being pulled through a tunnel. Back into the hills we go to the meat ladies house. I love the meat lady. We go and visit her when her boys all have to play hockey at the same time. Otherwise, one of her boys is always there. She always gives me meat. Lots. Sometimes right out of her meal. There is Stan Roper, a tall tall horsie. Stan has a white star on his head and so do I. We're brothers of different fur. He's already dressed in his blanket and saddle. Usually the biped puts Stans clothes on him but not today. One of the meat ladies boys is out already running all over the yard yelling and looks quite upset. It has leaky eyes. Biped asks the boy to shut up. They talk for a few minutes. I have to stay in the car. It's still slush falling from the sky but I can see them go in the house. Biped comes back to the car and grabs the rubble bag, straps it to Stan. Puts Mercy in a scabbard on Stans side. Next thing I know the biped is mashing a dirty old sock in my nose. MEAT LADY. It smells like meat lady. I know this game. I love this game. Except today instead of a nice sunny afternoon on foot sniffing for a toy, It is raining, snowing, slushing and still dark out, my toy smells like the meat lady. Biped gets to ride along on Stan. What fun. Lets go of my collar and I'm gone like a shot. Nose to the ground. Run across the field so fast I wonder if Stan can keep up. Biped loves Stan. They will stay together. If you have ever seen a blue heeler on the scent of something you know what I'm talking about. My nose was right in the dirt. Under a fence that Stan jumped right over. Biped and all. In a minute we're in the woods, thick cedar and maple and I worry about Stan being able to follow me. Thirty yards in I turn to see Stan and the biped ducking through thick limbs, and off I go. I can smell my toy that smells like the meat lady so well now because the snow is up in the trees. Thank you trees I say WOOF as I run. Go get her the biped shouts. It has been shouting encouraging things to me the whole time so far but I wasn't really listening. I smell some squirrels, a fisher, a weasel, a coyote, the lynx. Pay no attention. I smell my toy that smells like the meat lady. STOP dead in my tracks. Stand on my back paws and sniff the air. I must look funny standing like that, but I have to get my nose off the ground. The smell is in the air now. Stronger in the air than on the ground. I turn at a right angle, and start yelling my head off WOOFWOOFWOOF I found my toy. My toy is the meat lady! I run to the meat lady toy, yelling at the top of my lungs. I'm always so excited when I find my toy, and It's the meat lady too. I grab her paw in my mouth and pull. Let's go play meat lady. Meat lady says my name Liz. Liz oh Lizzie. I'm running back to tell Stan and Biped I found my toy and in five yards almost get stepped on. Biped gets off Stan, grabs Mercy. NO I jump to meat lady. You can't Mercy meat lady, then Mercy barks POW...POW...POW. I can hear another dog yelling. It's Diesel. Diesel is a huge bloodhound. She is one of my favorite dogs to play with. She is coming to play find my toy too. I have to sit beside Stan for a while. Biped looks at the meat lady all over, and cuts most of her soaking freezing clothes from her. Didn't really notice, I was so excited but she didn't stand up to greet me. She's all curled up and shivering. I'm yelling again. Biped throws me the sock. My prize. Biped pulling wool blankets out of the rubble bag and pulling them under her. Inches thick, layer after layer. Under, stuffing them under then wrapping blankets over the meat lady. Bipeds down parka is off, and it's wrapping the warm parka around the meat lady hood up. Mercy is back out of the scabbard and I inch over and lay on top of meat lady Mercy barks POW POW POW more quickly this time and Diesel is on top of us, yelling his head off so happy to see me. Here is Ollie, I think it is Stans brother because they look the same, just smell different. David is with Ollie. David is a biped too. It ties up Stan and Ollie to a tree and runs over to meat lady where my Biped is chatting her up. Laying in a big down bag with her. They all talk. David walks a short distance to another edge of the woods and lights a flare, I can hear a tractor coming. More men talking. The men arrive and lift meat lady and my biped on a hay wagon behind the tractor and we all run back to the house. I have to sit in the car. Covered in mud from the fields. Biped gets in the car and turns it on. Heater on full. I sniff the air from the vents. We drive drive more car ride. To the hospital in town. Evey one goes in, except me. Biped comes back with its parka, says gooood girl. You are such a goood girl. I get the biggest hug ever. Home now, fire burning. Cleaned off and drying. I get the biggest piece of roast from the fridge I've ever had in my life, and the biped has a huge glass of rum and lands on the couch. All that before ten in the morning. Biped sleeps for a few hours, and I dictate this too it when it wakes up.
I played my favorite game very well today. I haven't let go of the sock yet.
I'm a blue heeler